49 thoughts on “On the next CSI

  1. oh man! no colored eggs? no chocolate bunnies? (none for Bagel anyway)
    guess we’ll just have to keep celebrating Ostara. (pagan fertility holiday, ripped off for easter in the first place)

  2. Actually, it wouldn’t surprise me if it’s all Bagel’s fault. She probably tipped the cops off, and because of her, there will no longer be chocolate Easter bunnies.

    And MBHT, Cadbury Eggs are delicious evilness, and they shouldnt be purchased at CostCo/SamsClub by the dozen.

  3. !
    This is a pic of greatness.

    Heath, Rowan: As vile as chocolate is, it’s worse when filled with sugary spooge. How can ppl eat that stuff? Srsly, you ppl are disgusting.

    Still, you’ve not spoiled my appetite. I’m going to have delicious mustard sardines, microwave porkrinds, and extra-sour homemade yogurt for lunch. I like it with chunky.

  4. Dude. Sugar. Pure. Refined. Concentrated. ‘Nough said.

    While I’m happy that your appetite hasnt been spoiled, what you do in the privacy of your home is none of our business.

  5. guess we shouldn’t even mention the whole Peeps thing then huh?

    Well I ain’t goin down for the murder. Nope! (points to no one in particular) SHE did it!
    Or was it him? Dangit! Gotta get my alibi straight. I was at the mall, all by myself, buying peeps and no one saw me and I lost the receipt. But I was there I swearz!

  6. OMG The Bagel of Everything! Until I read that, I had a Cadbury egg on my desk, waiting to become dessert. I’ll never be able to eat a creme egg again. Thank goodness for the caramel-filled ones.

    I gave the egg to my mother. I’ll spare you all the detailed description of how she ate it.

    Purple Peeps are a lie! They do not taste purple! They’re fun in the microwave though.

    Tankoo to My Babies Have Tails (i has a tail too!) & to LolHeathen for da nice email hehe

  7. I sleep best knowing I’ve done my share of evil for the day.

    Srsly tho — you can’t blame me! Anyone who clicks a link labeled “filled with sugary spooge” deserves what they get.

    Purple peeps do too taste purple!
    Yellow ones are good too.
    Something weird with the pink ones, tho.

  8. wait, so if THAT’s what’s in teh cream filled ones…whut didja use for teh pnutbutter ones?
    nvrmind, dunwanna know!

  9. LOL! I’m sorry I couldn’t help it. Of course sick person that I am that lil gem came to me while I was eating a peanut butter egg. (evil grin)

  10. I take a couple of hours off to go to a funeral, and look what happens!
    !. you found a fish in the tomb?
    2. THAT”S what’s in a Cadbury egg? Richie Rich needs to fire that damn butler.
    3. THAT”S what spooge is? omg. i like the word.
    4. the other night my husband turned on the tv in the middle of Family Guy., the first words I heard was Brian: this peanut butter tastes funny. where’s it been?
    Peter: on my penis.
    5. one more observation about chocolate. I think that starting in childhood, we eat what we are given. our taste buds are obviously tasting food differently from each other, that’s why Mom loves broccoli and I call them trees cause that’s how they taste. Bagel, your taste buds just must not have been trained by Milton Hershey. I don’t taste poop, but I don’t like dark chocolate because to me it tastes spoiled or something. to me, the most bestest chocolate is Hershey’s kisses. I’ve had Godiva. I like Dove. but I think Hershey got me at an early age.

  11. Dark chocolate can be radically different depending on the source. Although I think only a fraction of people can taste the differences, there are other notes, like fruitiness. I usually only go for 60% or higher, though I like into the 90s. I even tried 100%, just because I had to know how bad it was. Yeah, it’s bad.

  12. Don’t make me post an entry with a picture of Chocolates of the World Bagel. I’ll do it. People still don’t understand the Bacon, think of what chocolate will do.

  13. Oh, too funny! The amazon.com ad on the top right of the main page was for Cadbury Mini Eggs and Cadbury Flake Bars, among other chocolatey goodness. I shall never look at Cadbury the same again. Of course, it won’t stop me from eating it, but I’ll definitely have a bit of weirdness lurking in the back of my mind.

  14. Was it the sidebar? Those are Omakase ads based on stuff you’ve browsed through at amazon before.

    @Bagel. Is nothing sacred? Candy Corn is one of the best things in the world.

  15. not to be outdone, here I go:
    1. I like chips and chocolate pudding. I like french fries dipped in chocolate milkshake. not a thing wrong with that. if there was, sweet and sour sauce would not exist.
    2. you know you won’t be able to stay in those chairs, Metz ‘n Tails. you’ll be in the fray momentarily.
    3. candy corn is the most perfect candy in existance. I buy enormous quantities in the fall to keep on eatin until jelly bean season.
    4.a latex crucifix dildo has a certain dignity that a chocolate crucifix lacks. that may be the tackiest thing I’ve ever seen. can’t you see some little kid, bunnies and eggs in his Easter basket, and suddenly he’s confronted by a chocolate dead guy on a cross.
    5. wasn’t it funny about Richie Rich? his butler’s named Cadbury? not funny? not?—–(trails off in a needy fashion.
    6. I think I’m gonna keep reading ration reality, I’ve learned some interesting things about youze. like I think Bagel is a chick. didn’t know that. nice.

  16. French fries in mayo!
    I don’t really like fries much either tho.
    Weird…there aren’t many foods I don’t like. I’m not a picky eater, I swear!

    Candy corn looks like old men’s toenails. I don’t like them, and I don’t much like peanuts — but if you put them together, I love them! Try it!

    Bagel is totally a chick.
    What interesting things have you learned?

  17. @Rowan, of COURSE the joke about Cadbury was teh funne, but since Cadbury is so dignified we decided to honor him by not giving into undignified laftur. 😉

  18. So that’s how they get children hooked on that “body of Jeebus” thing! They use chocolate and cherry Kool-Aid and then later switch ’em over to matzoh pieces and wine. Damn. I dropped out of catechism before they gave me booze. *grumble*

    Bagel, wait. Old men’s toenails and peanuts? EwwwE

    What about Circus Peanuts? I think they’re a precursor to Peeps with the gooshiness, but without the crunchy, sticky, sugary outer stuff. But no old man toenails. Again, ewwe!

  19. me three. never tried microwaving one, though. you gotta try nukin the peeps, it’s a riot. suddenly the cup you put it in grows a huge balloon out the top. the minute the nukin stops, it collapses into a glossy sugar substance that is the hardest thing known to man. I think it hits the Moh’s at 11.5.
    oh, and around here the question is nothing sacred is purely rhetorical.

    hey, did you notice on the wordpress dashboard there are links to other folks who are talkin’ bout usns? mostly they just express admiration that we’re still typing like we haven’t been struck by lightning yet.

  20. We have a lot of word of mouth linkage. I’ve seen many, many blogs link us. There’s usually a burst of activity when something new catches on Stumbleupon. Which this thread did actually. But yeah, it comes and goes. It’s also so very surprising how many people don’t hate us. On occasion someone will say we suck, but like 99% of the link ins people like us.

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